I was wondering how I might thank you for your beneficence in the provision to me of an unnecessary drug in my water supply. I understand that the fluoridation of water has absolutely no benefits for an elderly fellow like myself, or indeed the entire adult population – at least those adults not engaged in the production of this drug.
Then all of a sudden it struck me! I should thank you in a manner that parallels the benefit you are so graciously bestowing upon me.
Hence I enclose the first of a regular supply of condoms for your use.
I understand that as a married, monogamous woman, past child bearing age these items are of absolutely no use to you. Unlike fluoride in the water however, they cost very little, are beneficial to many in our society and have no adverse effects whatsoever.
I hope you enjoy them.
Bellis – Brisbane’s Sustainable House and Garden